Weddingguide


	PLANNING

	6 months before the wedding
	Decide on a date that suits both of you. Take your parents into account too.
	Decide what type of reception you want. That will determine what time of day
	you will get married.
	Establish the size of your budget.
	Book the church and the reception venue. Confirm it. Usually you book the
	organist at the same time, so do this now (there is a standard booking form at
	most churches).
	If you plan to rent anything, book now. Some items are so popular at certain
	times of the year that they may be booked months in advance.
	Book the people who will provide the music for the church ceremony and the
	reception now.
	If you want to lose a few kilograms before the wedding, start now.
	Order the wedding cake.
	Book the videographer and the photographer.
	Decide what your dress must look like. Try on a few different styles to decide
	what flatters your figure.
	Make a list of the wedding gifts you would like and give the list to a few shops.
	- Your fiancé can surprise you with the honeymoon location – that’s part of the
	romance. He must make the bookings now. If you will need passports, you
	must apply in good time.
	Draw up your guest list.
	Compare both sets of parents’ lists to avoid any duplication. Leave half of the
	invitations for the groom’s family and friends.

	4 months before the wedding
	Go to see the designer or person who will make your dress.
	Decide what kind of shoes you want and start looking for them. Discuss your
	decision with your dress designer.
	Decide who will be part of the bridal retinue. Discuss what they must wear with
	them and have the outfits made.
	Ask the person you want as your master of ceremonies to take on the task, and
	speak to the people who will make the toasts.
	Book the minister who will perform the ceremony.
	Go to see a gynaecologist.
	If you plan to dance at the reception, take a few lessons, if necessary.
	Start looking for clothes for the honeymoon.

	3 months before the wedding
	If you have not paid any deposits, make the necessary arrangements. Most
	photographers, caterers, florists, etc. only accept your booking once they have
	received the deposit.
	Finalise the guest list.
	Go to see the minister who will perform the ceremony. Most ministers expect a
	prospective couple to attend preparatory sessions or to get some pre-marital
	counselling before the wedding. In any case, it is a very good idea to take a
	pre-marital adjustment course. Many brides prepare for the wedding, which is
	only one day, for months and months. But a marriage must last a lifetime. So
	take the time and invest in a pre-marital course – it is worth it.
	When you go to see the minister, discuss the exact order of the service with
	him/her. Write everything down. Prepare thoroughly.
	Go to see the verger of the church. Check what is permitted and what is not.
	May you use candles, and may you use confetti? Arrange the date for the
	rehearsal with the verger, especially if you plan a large retinue, or there will
	be solo and/or other musical items. Make detailed notes.
	Talk to the person/people who will provide the music. Confirm the hymns to
	be played with the organist. Talk to the musicians who will provide music in
	the church. Let them show you examples from their repertoire, so that you can
	choose pieces you like.
	If you want to use a mobile discotheque or band at the reception, go to listen
	to them play. Discuss your taste with the person, but also take into account
	what your guests might like.
	Go to see the people who will do your make-up and hair. They normally do a
	trial run. If you want to perm or tint your hair or want to grow it for the
	wedding, ask your hairdresser exactly when you need to do what.
	Have the invitations printed. The person who pays for the reception sends out
	the invitations and acts as the host/ess. Usually the wedding is hosted by the
	bride’s parents, but the bridal couple can host the wedding themselves.
	Do not mention a gift register in the invitation. If guests ask, you or you
	mother can tell them.
	Find out what people’s postal addresses are and address the envelopes.
	Book the florist and decide what the bouquets must look like.
	Buy confetti or dried rose petals or make your own. These days there are
	interesting variations to confetti: you can use bubbles or feather confetti or
	strew fresh flowers.
	You and your fiancé can go to choose a suit for him.
	Decisions can be made about the outfits that the mother of the bride and the
	mother of the groom will wear.
	Groom yourself well and try not to pick up weight. Go to a beauty salon for a
	facial once a month from now on. It is remarkable what a difference regular
	facial treatments can make.
	Book a swanky car or carriage. If you plan to borrow a car from a friend or
	member of the family, ask the person to be the wedding chauffeur.

	2 months before the wedding
	Mail the invitations and include a map. Do not send out invitations less than
	six weeks before the wedding date.
	Have an antenuptial contract drawn up.
	If you were happy with the trial runs on your hair and make-up, book the
	hairdresser and beautician for the wedding day.
	The groom must book accommodation for the wedding night.
	Buy your going-away outfit and your honeymoon clothes.
	Buy the groom a gift. It can be anything special that fits into your budget. It is
	the thought that counts.




	1 month before the wedding
	Finalise the menu with the caterer. Get everything in writing. The wording is
	usually English. If you want any translation done, have it done by a
	professional. Proofread it!
	Finalise the number of bouquets with the florist. Arrange for buttonholes,
	corsages, flowers for hair, etc.
	Send guests who have asked details of your gift register.
	The groom must start working on his speech. The groom’s speech is one of the
	highlights of the wedding and it must be witty, concise, appropriate and
	interesting, and it must acknowledge all who have contributed to this special
	day.
	Decide on the seating plan and write the place cards. Seat people together
	who know each other and who will get on well.
	Inform people and businesses who need to know of any change of address.
	Keep your guest list up to date – check who can come. Some people will
	forget to respond. Contact them after the RSVP date and check whether they
	plan to come.
	Give the estimated number of guests to the caterers, rental agencies, etc.
	Arrange for parking for the guests.
	Buy your wedding rings.
	Get the pearls or other jewellery and accessories that you need to suit the
	style of your dress. Consult your dress designer.
	Buy your stockings, bath oils or foam bath, your favourite perfume, etc.
	Prepare to pamper yourself.
	If you plan to do your own make-up, check your stock.
	Make an alphabetical list of the guests. Have it typed, but bear in mind that
	there may be last minute changes.
	Buy the ribbon for the bridal car and give it to the driver to attach to the car.
	Ask him to keep an umbrella handy in the car in case there is a sudden
	shower.

	2 weeks before the wedding
	Inform the caterer of the exact number of guests. Most caterers only need the
	final numbers a week before the wedding.
	Work out the programme of speeches and toasts and discuss it with the master
	of ceremonies. Tell the master of ceremonies exactly what you want him to
	do, for example, how long he can speak and what kind of anecdotes he can
	tell. Give him all the instructions in writing, or he may use the wrong names!

	1 week before the wedding
	Ask someone to look after your wedding dress while you are on honeymoon.
	Ask a reliable person to check that any rented items are returned safely.
	Arrange that a friend or member of the family will be in charge of gifts
	brought to the wedding/reception venue. The gifts must be taken to your
	home after the reception.
	Collect your wedding dress and accessories. Check that everything fits
	properly.
	Collect the outfits that the groom and your retinue will wear.
	Collect your wedding cake.
	Confirm all arrangements with everyone concerned. Make a list of everyone –
	from the flower girls to the caterer. Call every single one and check that
	everything is still on track. This list must be complete. Every person who needs
	to do anything must be on that list. For your own peace of mind, confirm
	things in writing too – it makes people realise that you are serious.
	Have a rehearsal in the church so that every member of the bridal retinue
	knows exactly what he/she must do.
	Buy gifts for everyone who has helped you, and for the retinue. You can get
	anything that you can afford.
	Pack your clothes for the honeymoon. Draw up lists.

	The day before
	Do not eat too much, stay calm and rest as much as possible.
	Do your nails.
	Pamper yourself – go to the beauty salon for a facial mask and exfoliate. Use
	lashings of moisturiser all over.
	If you plan to get dressed anywhere but at home, have a checklist for all the
	items you will need.
	Put out everything you will need the next day, or, if you plan to dress
	elsewhere, take everything you need there.
	Do not go to bed too late.
	Give the gifts to your retinue.
	Phone the minister to remind him/her. It is not all that unusual for the minister
	to forget!

	On your wedding day
	Do not get up too early. Sleep in as long as you can.
	Have a good, light breakfast in bed.
	Go to the hairdresser and beauty salon.
	Have a relaxing (tepid) bath after you have been to the hairdresser. Keep the
	door and windows open to prevent any build-up of steam.
	Use enough moisturiser. Use a light talc to absorb perspiration. Apply a
	deodorant 20 minutes after your bath.
	Put on your dress carefully so that your hair is not disturbed and your make-up
	does not smudge or rub off on the dress. Ask someone to assist you.
	Finally, remember that guests normally do not even notice any small details
	that go wrong!